Dear Princess Darby,

I am in love and engaged to this wonderful person. I left to go away to school for a while, but will be returning home with her to go to school.

Since I've been away I have been having dreams about my ex who I found out before I left that she is still in love with me, and when I come home she wants to be with me. Now I am just finding out that my ex has feelings for me, and I didn't tell my girlfriend.

What do I do?





Dear What Do I Do,

I have read your letter several times. Each time visualizing your choices and future.

Although I do know the choices we make now in life are footprints on the path of our future, and steps into the lives of others, thus their paths of life.

Two words in your letter stood out, engaged and dreams. The verb engage means "bound by promise or contract", the noun engagement meaning "bethrothal, battle".

The word dream is a noun meaning .."events in the mind of sleeping perons, fantasy, ideal, or aspiration".

Is there a commitment here made with good judgement a mature love?

May I suggest you look into the eyes and soul of the person you are engaged to. Reflect on the reason your "ex" is your ex. Remember why you broke up, your feelings when you stepped forward from that relationship, and why you moved on.

There must be valid reasons for all your actions. Thomas Wolfe wrote once, "we can't go home"...or words to that effect.

You make the choice, but be fair and logical. Discuss this with your partner. Reverse the situation and think about how you would be treated and would feel.

But, I can't help wondering why, if your ex still loved you, why didn't she go to you before? And, if you found out she still loved you before you left, why you didn't act on it?

You make the decision.

With whom, and where, are you spending your holidays?

Princess Darby