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Paperback
Publisher: Stonewall Inn Editions
For many gay men and lesbian women, the first step in a long journey is acknowledging and accepting their sexuality. But what happens to those men and women after they have come to terms with this aspect of their lives? For many it may mean a complete reevaluation of very basic issues: family, relationships, community, and love.
In this series of essays, McNaught explores these various aspects of life that may now be called into question for these men and women, and he sets out to educate and help guide them through the challenges they may encounter.
Now That I'm Out, What Do I Do? solidifies McNaught's place as one of the best-known speakers on the issues that face gays and lesbians.
Writing with the "newly elect" in mind, Brian McNaught advises his readers on how to forge connections within the sometimes thorny gay, lesbian, and bisexual communities while still maintaining ties with family and old friends. Along the way, he discusses sexual ethics, same-sex marriage, work, spirituality, and political action. Readers who have been out for a year or more, or who grew up in large cities, may find McNaught's earnest tone and tortoise pace too basic, or even unintentionally funny. (After telling us, for example, that he and his gay brother, Tommy, feel comfortable with each other in the way McNaught imagines that compatible heterosexual brothers might feel, he confides that they "talk often about issues from our childhood that we are currently working on in therapy.") But for the neophyte, his tolerant and deliberate approach will feel welcoming. A good introductory book for adolescents as well, and the families of gay people. --Regina Marler
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| A great addition to the sociology of being gay |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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Brian McNaught is truly to heterosexism what Gloria Steinem is to sexism. McNaught takes what heterosexism does to gay and lesbian children and says what would it be like if heterosexual male and female kids and teens were forced to have to dance with, kiss and say, "I love you's" to members of the same gender to which they are not attracted to romantically or sexually? He points out how that would be sexual abuse and how there is no comparable public outcry to what happens to gay and lesbian children. McNaught has been a voice for gays and lesbians since the 1970's and is a true role model. I hope he writes more books and leads us to the next step!
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| Good autobiography--but not a self-help book |
| Customer Rating: 4 out of 5 |
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This is a well-written and interesting account of many issues that Brian McNaught has faced as a gay man. These include his loss of faith in organized Catholicism, experiences with gays in politics and organizations, how he made straight friends and allies, ways he came out to his family and formed a new family of gay friends, and his trials of fighting discrimination in the workplace (he was fired due to his sexuality). All his experiences are worth reading about. The only caveat I'd have is that the title of the book and the first chapter sort of make it seem like it's a how-to, self-help book for the perplexed gay man who doesn't fit in to the gay world and wants to adjust. The book really isn't that at all, except in the broadest sense in that you can learn to emulate McNaught as a role model through his autobigraphical tales. This is not a psychology book. There are many other books available that are more directly focused on providing advice and guidance to those who want to make the most of a gay life, and that do so with a more therapeutic perspective. So just be aware of what this book is, and is not, before you buy.
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| Dummish |
| Customer Rating: 3 out of 5 |
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"Now that I'm out, what do I do?" Uh... live your life maybe? Uh... get on with the next thing? Uh... BE HAPPY? I'm sorry, I realize that this book was very sincerely endeavored, and that a lot of sweat and tears went into its writing; and I really made an effort to appreciate it because of that fact. But I just found that my reaction to what I was reading was very often, to use the vernacular, "duh". I was coming to terms with being gay myself at the time I began it, and was just for the first time beginning to get into reading a lot of literature that I had never let myself look into before. I was reading Andrew Sullivan's Virtually Normal at the time. I found I just kept putting this book aside for the other, and had to make myself start back into every so often. Maybe other readers will be happier with it. But again the best way for me to summarize my own reaction is, "Duh".
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| being who you are, and enjoying it. |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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Now That I'm Out was one of the first books I read after accepting the fact that I was gay. And of all the books I've read since coming out, this was probably my favorite. If you're dealing with your own sexuality, I strongly recommend this book. McNaught writes in a manner that's both lighthearted and serious. His wit and humor keep you turning the pages. And the variety of subjects he covers will provide every gay person with the help they need as they ask themselves the famous question: Now that I'm out, what do I do?
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| Recommended |
| Customer Rating: 5 out of 5 |
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McNaught (also the author of Gay Issues in the Workplace, a "certified sexuality educator," exhibits a mature perspective and supporting anecdotal material in this very personal guide to living and thinking gay after coming out. He takes on such topics as gay youth, marriage, family, religion and the workplace in an attempt to address one essential issue to gays: "Why do even those of us who consider ourselves out of the closet often duck personal questions when we know the truthful responses will both liberate us and change the attitudes and behavior of others?" Education and a vaguely spiritual form of self-realization, McNaught concludes, are the answer for gays and straights alike. Years of fielding questions during his talks to corporations and universities across the country has provided him with concise and focused takes on significant problems facing gays in America today. Chattily and cogently written, this book offers solid advice to the majority of gays, who are neither activist nor self-loathing, on how to come to terms with themselves in both gay and mainstream society.
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